My Blog
Windmills of the Minds - Company Message
RSS Follow Become a Fan

Delivered by FeedBurner


Recent Posts

Being my own Worst Enemy.
The power of listening to your children
Millennium Parenting
Listening- a missing element of social media?
'If you want to go fast, go alone, if you want to go far, go together. African Proverb

Categories

Becoming who you are
Bullying
Community
Counselling
Fear
Life
Parenting
Relationships
Responsibility
Self care
Trust

Archives

April 2020
January 2017
December 2016
November 2016
October 2016
September 2016
August 2016
July 2016
June 2016
December 2015
August 2015
May 2015
April 2015
March 2015
December 2014
May 2014
November 2013
October 2013
February 2013
December 2012

powered by

My Blog

Managing conflict for Separated Parents

Many parents who separate because they don't want to be in conflict anymore, usually find that they end up in more conflict over the children. If you are a separated parent reading this, try to focus on your own behaviour, how you can help ease the conflict and the impact on your child.

Why does the conflict arise?
Separated parents actually take some time to separate beyond the actual physical separation. Emotionally we sometimes stay attached, this can take a while to move on if you were the one that did not want the relationship to dissolve.

Recovering Relationship Ruptures in Parenting- Mini Blog

Below are some questions that can help heal past parenting relationship issues and understand yourself as a parent. It helps to ask these questions without judging or blame, this is about understanding, then being able to take action to improve relationships, our own well being and parenting. 

Write down five words which describes what you feel towards your parents or did do?

Did you want something from them that you didn't receive, what was this? What difference would this have made to your relationship?

Mini blogs- Dilemmas in life

Dilemmas in life

Are you at a crossroads? Not sure which way to go. For some of us decision making is incredibly challenging. This becomes a dilemma.
Small day to day decisions might be......What clothes to wear? Whether to order the fish or the meat dish? What route to take..even these decisions or choices can feel like mountains for some of us.
Life changing decisions may be........Do i change my career and take the new job? Shall i move somewhere else, ?Do i stay in this relationship or do i leave?

Support networks

You may here a great deal from mental health and emotional well being services that support networks are vital in keeping well. The NHS definitely recommend that we need a good support circle to maintain our well being.

In my experiences of working with others professionally and my own personally, i hear and see that having people who are supportive around us helps us cope with the challenges and slumps in life.

People who feel they have people to talk to often will cope much better than if we don't.

What does your New Year 2016 look like?

With the new year approaching, I felt the welcome urge to write a new blog. I haven't wrote for a while, writing is one of my passions, sometimes I  loose connection with passions,  I am determined to make space for the writing more often.

Which leads me onto the fabulous New Year, what does this look like for you? First of all,  i think it is helpful before we do this to spend some valuable time reflecting on this year, take a look back and process what has been your happiest, saddest and most enjoyable moments.

Im not going to be the person im expected to be anymore'

The you tube video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pQKjMvG7BLU, now albeit from a after shave advert, the title of my blog, I am not going to be who I am expected to be any more to me once echoed in my mind once when I felt I had enough of trying, I felt the need to share this with others.

Having experiences of my own related to trying to live up to others expectations ( or my perception of them) also my experiences of working with others who feel like they are a failure and that they are letting others or themselves down.

Reflections on Counselling Part 2

In my journey of counselling we are taught to questions ourselves and what we do. What does counselling actually do?
I will answer this question from my own beliefs, training, values and perspectives. 

First of all, what counselling does not provide a quick fix for problems . Counselling is not about telling you what to do or how to do it. As a counsellor my role is not to judge you or situations you are in. My role is not to give you the answers but for you to find the answers that you have within you.

Reflections on counselling

Talking to a trained counselling professional is different from having a chat with a friend or a family.
Counsellors are highly trained professionals in working with others therapeutically to enable the person to work through challenging times. 

My counselling training lasted over 10 years and i continue to update my learning in different aspects to increase my skills and widen my knowledge. Also keeping up to date with the changes in policies and the government.

It takes a great deal of work and commitment in this profession to maintain good standards of work.

FOR SEPARATED PARENTS

For Separated Parents
children counselling






I would first like to acknowledge that I write from a separated parent perspective and I am supportive and compassionate to all single parents, regardless of race, gender or age etc.
I think single parents receive some bad press, however, single or together is not the issue here. How we relate to one another is. Relationships being the key to having a happier life.
 
Secondly, I’m sure you will agree with me, being a separated parent can be incredibly tough. We may feel like we are up and down emotionally, not sure how to feel.

Christmas .. What does this celebration time mean to you?


‘Money cannot buy life’
                                     Bob Marley
Christmas can be an incredibly joyous time for some, or an incredibly difficult, sad or stressful time for others. It is good to consider what stresses we can not avoid and ones we place on ourselves that could be avoided. Such as spending too much money or over committing to please everyone.