Listening well is a skill that takes some time to practice and master. To be able to listen well to your child consider the following. This will usually reduce any behavioural issues, confusion and most of all strengthen the bond between you both.
If you can, forget your own concerns, stop what you are doing for the time being and concentrate on what they are saying, watch body language for extra clues. Listen for content and feeling, what is it they are trying to tell you? How are they feeling?
If you don't have the time to stop, let your child know that you want to listen to them and will make time for them once you are able to.
Look at your child, eye contact and make physical contact if your child is comfortable with this.
Check with your child that you have heard and understood them well, reflect back to them their words.
Listen out for themes, repeating words, how they say they feel, hurt, angry?
Listen without judging or trying to offer them a solution. Encourage them to think of possible solutions if there is a specific problem. Or they may need a hug or someone to listen and know they understand.
By doing this we strengthen the bond by
DEVELOPING TRUST
COMPASSION
SUPPORT
UNDERSTANDING
FEELING VALUED
Children will feel
HEARD
UNDERSTOOD
IMPORTANT
SUPPORTED
Your child will learn skills
EMPATHISING
LISTENING TO YOU AND OTHERS
EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE
VOCABULARY TO EXPRESS EMOTION
If you would like more support in building this relationship with your child please contact me windmillsoftheminds@gmail.com to discuss services offered.